Monday, March 17, 2008

I need to get out of my head sometimes. I've tried so hard to do that lately, and the way I've tried is by talking more, but then I notice people acting as if they'd kill their mothers to make me shut up. I can tell, the way they move so that their backs are facing me, the distant, glazed look they get whenever I try to say something, the excuses they find to be somewhere else. They liked me better when I would just come up with a snappy one-liner every once in a while. I did too, actually.

I can't tell if I'm normal if a bit on the introspective side, or an overthinking, antisocial freak of nature. Am I the only person who has extremely involved daydreams nearly all the time? I invent situations, and then think of how people I know would react to them, and what I would do, and on and on and it's an hour later and I have no idea what I'm supposed to be doing. I get so bored and frustrated with regular life that I just think about something dramatic happening to me. I daydream so often and so intensely that half the time I forget that everything I think about is a lie.

See? If I didn't think those things, (or in this case, write them down), then I would just SAY THEM. OUT LOUD. TO PEOPLE. I just have no idea how people deal with me.

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